postcard. heart and voice. shinning light. ocean.
which one did we not screw up?
none.

and so we've failed to make him smile. again.
ok. maybe it was a genuine smile.
but then, everyone including the audience knows that we screwed it up.

my band experiences all revolve around him. no matter in school or out of school.
listening to tales and singapore rhapsody made me feel so lucky.
and it saddens me that i cant do something or rather play something to make him happy.
make him proud of us.
i've failed in every single attempt.
even when we were with the supposedly best players

it's not that they're not good.
it's just that there were too many half-hearted
i guess we were freaked. well at least i was.
but the problem was that i was freaked because i knew too well that we did not have enough practice and that everything would be by luck
and see what happens when you depend on luck.

i think we all owe him an apology
i felt as if i've ruined his reputation.
in front of all those people.

maybe im over-reacting.
i want to cry.

i want a professional recording of with heart and voice
i want flawless memories